Interaction with the World

I asked the people of our church to submit questions about the Bible and the Christian life, and I promised to answer them in a sermon. This morning I gave the answers, but ran out of time. The question that I wasn't able to answer is a very good question, and I think the answer I prepared will be edifying not just to the people of our local church, but to other believers as well. So I am posting the question and my answer here.

Question: Where do you draw the line in interaction with the world for adults and for children?
What about watching TV shows that feature people who are known for sinful lifestyles off-screen, such as a lifestyle of sexual immorality? What about friendships with unbelievers?

Answer:
There is a better question than, “Where do you draw the line?” This question is about externals rather than the heart. It presupposes that a person will be OK if they stay away from a certain level of worldliness.

Take movies as an example. Some Christians use the movie’s rating to draw a line. Perhaps children are not allowed to watch PG-13 or "worse," while adults do not allow themselves to watch R or "worse." Anything with a "better" rating is considered OK to watch. The mentality is that smaller amounts of inappropriate material won’t hurt a person, but larger amounts will. So you need to know where to draw the line.

This is not the Christian mentality but the mentality of the Pharisees. They sought conformity to the Law of God by creating and following all kinds of new laws regarding external behavior. In other words, they were all into drawing lines. For example, they said that on the Sabbath, it was OK to spit on a rock, but not on the dirt, because spitting on dirt makes mud, which is work.

The Christian mentality, on the other hand, recognizes that our biggest problem is with our heart, and the condition of our heart is NOT a product of our environment.

Mark 7:18-23 And He said to them, "Are you so lacking in understanding also? Do
you not understand that whatever goes into the man from outside cannot defile
him, because it does not go into his heart, but into his stomach, and is
eliminated?" (Thus He declared all foods clean.) And He was saying, "That which
proceeds out of the man, that is what defiles the man. For from within, out of
the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders,
adulteries, deeds of coveting and wickedness, as well as deceit, sensuality,
envy, slander, pride and foolishness. All these evil things proceed from within
and defile the man." (NASB)

The big problem is with our heart. If the problem were our worldly environment, Jesus would not have prayed the way He did...

John 17:15-18 "I do not ask You to take them [Jesus' disciples] out of the
world, but to keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I
am not of the world. Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth. As You sent
Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world." (NASB)

Jesus did not want the Father to take His disciples out of the world. Instead, He sent His disciples into the world. You should have friendships with unbelievers, and you should be training your children how to live for Christ in the world.

So what would be a better question than, “Where do I draw the line for my kids and myself?” A better question regarding yourself is, “How can I glorify God while I interact with the world?” A better question regarding your kids is, “How can I equip and encourage my kids to glorify God while they interact with the world?”

I could write a series of messages on the question, “How can I glorify God while I interact with the world?” Let me scratch the surface for now.

1 Thessalonians 5:21-22 "But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good; abstain from every form of evil."

While interacting with a non-Christian friend, you should be examining carefully everything they do and say. While your kids interact with non-Christian friends, they should be learning to do the same. While you watch TV, you should be examining carefully everything that is said and portrayed on the screen. When your kids watch TV, they should be learning to do the same.

You and your kids are to examine whether the things you hear and observe are “good” or a “form of evil." If something is good, you are to “hold fast to it” (follow the example). If it is a “form of evil,” you are to “abstain” from it (keep yourself from following the example).
This is the exercise of discernment.

Here is an example. If your kids watch Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty, you ought to pause the movie at different points to discuss what is going on. These movies in particular send a message that the greatest thing in life is to find your Prince Charming, your true love. It tells a young girl that the greatest thing is to have a romance with a boy. Together with your kids, compare this message with Scripture. Consider the following:

Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still
sinners, Christ died for us.

Matthew 22:37-38 "'YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD
YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.' This is the great and foremost commandment."

The Bible indicates that the greatest thing in life is be loved by God and to love Him in return. Though God may give your children a spouse some day, they don't need such a relationship. A relationship with God is far greater and what they truly need. If you don't discuss this with your children, they will probably be deceived, even by something as "innocent" as Sleeping Beauty. The solution isn’t to keep your kids from ever watching Sleeping Beauty. Then they would not be trained to exercise discernment but to be legalists.

If you watch a movie with your spouse, don’t just watch it and move on with your life. Discuss together what you saw. What were the examples of good? What were the examples of evil?


After spending time with an unbeliever, pray about what you observed in their life. “Lord, give me Your perspective on how this person talked and behaved. What was good that I can learn from? What was evil that I must abstain from?” The solution isn’t to distance yourself from unbelievers. You will never lead them to Christ that way. The solution is to actively exercise discernment.


If you and your kids do not examine everything carefully, holding fast to the good and abstaining from the evil, you will inevitably follow the world. God has created us with a tendency to become like the people we get to know. They tend to rub off on us. This is a wonderful thing if you are spending time getting to know God. But this tendency to become like others must be resisted when we are interacting with the world.


The tendency to follow the world must be actively resisted in two ways. The first way is what we have been talking about—exercising discernment. The second way is to work hard at getting to know God for the purpose of becoming like Him. Actively getting to know God and becoming like Him will keep you from becoming like anyone else.


Both the exercise of discernment and the pursuit of knowing God require an ongoing process of being sanctified in the truth of the Word of God. Consider Jesus' prayer again. Notice the mention of being sanctified in the truth...

John 17:15-18 "I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but to keep
them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not
of the world. Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is
truth. As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the
world."

As a follower of Jesus who has been sent into the world, you must be immersing yourself in the Word of God day and night. And as a parent, you must be teaching your children the Word of God. You must be teaching them the Word in regular times of family worship. And you must be teaching them the Word throughout the day as you go through life together, using the issues of life to point your children to the Word.

Deut 6:6-7 These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on
your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall
talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when
you lie down and when you rise up.

Immerse yourselves in the Word so that you and your kids are getting to know God, in order to become like Him rather than like the world. Immerse yourselves in the Word so that you and your kids are getting to know the truth, in order to examine the world according to the truth.


There is one last principle to keep in mind that is gleaned from Paul's discussion of eating food sacrificed to idols...

Romans 14:22-23 The faith which you have, have as your own conviction
before God. Happy is he who does not condemn himself in what he
approves. But he who doubts is condemned if he eats, because his
eating is not from faith; and whatever is not from faith is sin.

If you have doubts that a certain interaction with the world would please God, then this passage says going ahead with the interaction would be sin. As Christians, we are to only engage in an activity if we have the faith that it is pleasing to God.